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Writer's pictureThe Assless Chaplain

The Assless Chapel Newsletter #20: The Waiting Period Edition

Updated: Feb 15, 2023

The Chaplain’s Weekly Screed


We all know that feeling – the same one we’ve experienced again and again since we were children. That thing where you’re excited for something, (so, so, excited), but you don’t really have a way to occupy your busy mind or idle hands to prepare for it. The days before you fly to see family when you’re 8. The hour before your friend’s parents drop him off to play and your 10 year old face is already peeking out the window. The restless night before your first sleepaway camp at 11. The couple of hours of drinking when you’re twenty, you’re throwing a big party and, as always, all your friends are late. The 15 minutes your wife needs to finish up a few things before she can relax and get into your planned naked time that generally has to be scheduled a week in advance because work, kids, life, etc. when you’re… let’s just say, hypothetically, 40 (at least that’s what I heard from my friend The Chassless Aplain.)


Well, I’m kind of going through that right now with Burning Man. I’ve been organizing Burning Man stuff: need to throw away the couch and clean the tents. Mostly, I’m checking the website daily just to see there’s nothing new. Soon, all the bureaucracy will start up again, which makes me happy: keeps me feeling in touch with the spirit of the Playa. But right now, well… not a whole lot of exciting things to do. Just waiting for Placement and dealing with some of the gear. So, I went for a run for the first time in many, many years. I guess the least I can do is get in better shape, so I’m not nearly having a heart attack pedaling that garbage-ass tricycle of mine around the Playa. And there’s this video ode to the 2022 Temple Burn Crew to kill 2 minutes.


Group News


No Group News to report but let me know if you’ve got something to share.


Black Rock City News


If you’re interested, the 2023 Camp Symposium is scheduled for March 18th. Here is the link. Hopefully there’s more information coming soon.


If you or anyone you know is interested in designing stuff for Burning Man, the form-loving folks at BORG have a form for that!


Placement / Ticket News


Well, no big news on Placement and ticketing, although if you are planning on buying a FOMO ticket, it’s time to register between February 1-3 (noon); 1000 tickets at $2,750; 3,000 at $1,500; this disqualifies you from Main Sale, STEP and OMG. Learn more here.


No news from Placement and a couple of weeks until the Place Camp Questionnaire opens up.


Upcoming Tasks


· Decide if you’ll be part of The Assless Chapel in 2023. I’ll want to know soon.


· Let me know if you have any news to share.


· Send me your feedback on the camp’s placement.


Closing Thoughts


Reading this newsletter’s screed, I wonder if this waiting for Burning Man means I’m not focusing on Immediacy enough. Frankly, of course, I’m happy we have plenty of time before the next Burn. Time to plan and improve our camp; time to get in shape; time to not have to suffer in the elements of the Playa. But, just like when you’re fasting, flying or driving somewhere, the closer you get, the more excruciating it is to get through each second. We’ll get to that point. In a couple of weeks, things will start to slowly gear up, until we just can’t take it anymore. And, then, like the man’s part in making a baby, we’ll get to burst out of ourselves and create something wonderful.



“And sure enough, even waiting will end...if you can just wait long enough.”

-William Faulkner


The Man burns in 214 days!

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